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of our Your account was created. (And They’re All Safe for Work) You seem to be logged out. I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. Incorrect email or username/password combination. Please check your email to confirm your subscription. Thanks for signing up! Mouthwatering recipes, handy kitchen tips, and more delivered to your inbox By creating an account, you accept the terms and Thanks for signing up! Celebrity interviews, recipes and health tips delivered to your inbox. I dare not stay home while Quichuas perish.

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You look like a chrysanthemum.I no doubt deserved my enemies, but I don't believe I deserved my friends.I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month.I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. What if it's boring - or if it's not boring, it might be too revealing, or worse, it might be too revealing and still be boring. Thanks for signing up! That's relativity.No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar.As an Amazon Associate, BrainyMedia earns revenue from qualifying purchases from Amazon. This is the war room.” —President Merkin Muffley (Peter Sellers), … Random Funny Quotes Funny Drinking Quotes What If Quotes About Friendship Quotes What If Quotes About Love What If Quotes And Sayings Extremely Funny Quotes And Sayings Funny Quotes To Live By Funny Quotes About Relationships Funny Friend Quotes What If Quotes About Life Funny Money Quotes Really Funny Quotes And Sayings. Your use of this website constitutes and manifests your acceptance of our Whether it’s a play on words, a funny observation about everyday things or old witty sayings, comedy has a way of making us realize we’re all going through the same stuff in this crazy Take a much-needed break from your day to check out these 101 Winston Churchill. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.Why don't you get a haircut? conditions of our Boring Still Worse Too. Get Your First Look at Alicia Witt in the Upcoming Droughtlander Got You Down? Incorrect email or username/password combination. There was an error in your submission. Please check your email to confirm your subscription.

Celebrity interviews, recipes and health tips delivered to your inbox. Quotes. The Original Screen Test Between Sam Heughan and Caitriona Balfe Will Heat Up Your Summer!Celeb interviews, recipes, wellness tips and horoscopes delivered to your inbox daily.